By the fullness of Your House

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It is rather a challenge to put my thoughts together this evening. Maybe it is because I am tired, and the weariness of daily-activities (or procrastination of them) have been eating at me a bit these past few days. The feeling that you're in a transitory stage, a section of your life you are desperate to get done with and move onto the next phase of life's journey, and feeling trapped in the tedium of your present duties. . . that pretty much sums up my emotions right now. 

And sometimes, it is so easy to escape.

So much easier to drown yourself in the frivilous-time-eating stuff, movies, internet, social media, chatter, noise, busy-life-activities, and 'wholesome nonesense' than to take stock of your duties, be responsible and get the job done, no matter if it is a rather messy one, or you are bored by it, and feel alone. But God honours a faithful worker - being perseverant about our present duties and calling. The two words I have felt this year were most a challenge for me were "thankfulness" and "faithfulness". In other words, I must jolly well rejoice in all things, and must faithfully persevere at being thankful and faithful. The job will not get done, the mountain will not be overcome, unless this or that tiny, irritating thing, and this little insignificant task which I feel like postponing GETS DONE! 

In theses "insignificant" things, I speak of my schooling, my music training, my writing and literary self-education and in my family life and tasks at hand. But they are so very important to me, and I struggle and worry and cry and fail and get it all wrong. And yet the Lord knows, He loves and cares. . . and I am so happy and thankful in spite of my feelings of how much I lack and am needy and can't go on. Because the Lord is with me. And also, there is joy and interest and lots of fun to this stage of life - much to treasure and learn and soak up in - things I do not want to miss, or let pass. I want to redeem the time, treasure it and thank God for every blessing and experience I am in.

It seemed much easier in the first half of the year though - now we are a few days away from being half-way-done with 2014 (*gasps*), and the climb, the effort is ever so much more challenging. And my cry is, Lord, please help me. I can't do it by myself. Be there with me and help me thank you and glorify your name in the good and in the hard, in the exciting times, and in the difficult-up-hill-enchanted-meadow times. Give me the perseverance and strength! Without you I can do nothing. I am a barren fruit. Come in, dear Lord, and wash me with Your precious blood; let me drink from the fountain of life, and rejoice in Your constant Presence by my side and in your faithfulness.

"How precious is your lovingkindness, O God!
Therefore the children of men put their trust under the shadow of Your wings.
They are abundantly satisfied by the fullness of Your house,
And you give them drink from the river of Your pleasures
For with You is the fountain of life;
In Your light we see light."
- Psalm 36: 7-9

Comments

  1. Joy, this fits into my current situations so incredibly well. Almost everything you said are practically the echoes of my own heart! I haven't much else to say but thank you so much for this. It's a reminder I think I needed.

    "The feeling that you're in a transitory stage, a section of your life you are desperate to get done with and move onto the next phase of life's journey, and feeling trapped in the tedium of your present duties. . . that pretty much sums up my emotions right now." This is me. Perhaps not so much at this present moment, but dear girl, at least a month or so ago I was thinking those exact same thoughts. I don't know what else to say but that I understand. I really and truly understand. My momma said the same thing when I showed those words to her.

    So, darlin', just know you're not alone in this sometimes mundane, sometimes adventures, sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes exhilarating, always messy life. I'm right there along with ya. And it's beautiful. It's messy, but it really is beautiful despite the dishes to scrub and the math to plow through and the boredom of the everyday chores. ^.^

    I'll be praying for you, sweet girl. Love you!

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    1. Aww, thank you, dear Em <3. Your words put a happy smile on my face and just really encouraged me a lot, sweetheart! <3 Somehow I knew that perhaps you would relate to this post as we both are relatively in similar stages of our lives with schoolwork and chores and waiting and learning and waiting--and, oh, it can be really frustrating, can't it? But so joyful and beautiful too at the same time! I am glad this post struck a chord with you, though I really hope and pray things are much happier and blessed these days for you and you aren't too burdened :).

      It hasn't really been easy these past few months, especially seeing my older sisters and most of my friends already either working or studying university. . . and I am still plowing through mundane PACE's :P. Lately, I have just felt a little lonely and out of place in what I do. But at the same time, it struck me just how privileged I am to have this time to study at home and have a more quietish schedule; it is the place God has allowed me to be right now in my life, and much as I chaff and grumble, I have so much to be grateful about that would goad me to courage and perseverance!

      Thank you so much, Emily dear girl. I am praying for you too!

      P. S. I have just finished your beautiful novel, Cry of Hope, this week and I loved it so much. I can't to tell you more about how I enjoyed it :)

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  2. Amen, Joy. Thank-you for sharing your heart; I was really blessed by this post. <3 God bless you as you strive to faithfully labor at the tasks that He has called you to accomplish!

    Much Love,
    Schuyler

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    1. Thank you so much, Schuyler, for your loving words of encouragement; I greatly appreciate that! Amen, that is my prayer and current spiritual challenge as well, and I confess I haven't always gotten it right, but the Lord is teaching me :)

      I am glad you were blessed by this post too. I have you in my prayers as well <3. Much love and blessings!

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  3. Oh Joy! I can never express the things of my heart in words very easily, but you nailed it! I so so so hear where you are as I am recently just coming out of the same place. The word I had at thee start of the year was to do the same things with a fresh anointing. Sending heaps of hugs and sympathy and prayers... :) My inbox is always open if you want to offload... :)

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    1. Oh dear Emily, thank you so much for your sweet comment! I am so glad you could relate to this post. I confess I wrote this post after a day i was feeling I had really messed things up and failed; I put up this post to help me put into words my resolion to persevere and be faithful in what I must do, by God's grace :).

      Oh, that is truly a wonderful desire to ask the Lord for a fresh anointing. I know I very much need a spiritual refreshing in my life, and a new hunger for the things of God. You don't know how much I appreciate your prayers, dear friend. That is such a blessing. May the Lord Jesus bless you too and give you the desire of your heart!!

      P. S. Yes indeed I would be very glad to keep in extra contact through email (slow as I am with emailing these days :p).

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  4. An excellent post, Joy. I've been feeling somewhat "trapped" in that next stage of life, as you said, and it's so easy to fritter away hours of the day...so thank you for the encouraging post! And the verse you put with the post was perfect! :)

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    1. Thank you very much, Clara! I definitely can relate to that, and right now that is my biggest struggle too. Somehow it really feels a bit like Christian and Hopeful in Enchanted Meadow, doesn't it? But I am glad you were encouraged by this post :).

      Also I am so excited to see around Fullness of Joy blog. Thank you for your lovely comment!

      P. S. Yes, I do indeed love this verse. It is very special.

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  5. (I will be coming back to respond to all of your sweet comments tomorrow, Lord willing. Right now, I must apply the words of this post, and head off to bed!)

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